Abby's journal



February 24, 2017


Perhaps we will try to channel a short entry this evening, while Steve is winding down and preparing for bed. He has been adjusting to his new environment in Portland, Maine--where we once lived in 1839-41--and also visiting as many of the places associated with our life there, as possible. He has been reporting on all this in his own blog, so we won't repeat that, here. I am with him quite often--moreover, his sense of my presence is stronger here, and he can more readily tell when I am with him, and when I am absent. Why? I can't explain this easily. Every place has a vibe, a sort of personality. This all has to do with how the subconscious mind works. Steve's subconscious mind picks up on the "vibe" of Portland, and recognizes it. All of this is unknown to Steve. He feels it; and this helps create a feeling bridge to me, since I was associated, once, with his life in Portland. Does that make sense? He can more readily tune in, because he is on the right channel, so to speak. I can't explain it better, through channeling.

He feels Portland; and he feels me. Tuning into Portland, he remembers me, my energy. Remembering my energy, in Portland, he tunes into my energy, now. Does that make more sense?

He remembered (and wrote about) standing with me by his side, both of us looking out on the water where the sea meets Casco Bay, near the Portland Head Light. I remember that very well. I wish I could describe to you what I was feeling at that time...I was in heaven. I was with my man, securely snuggled up warm next to him, with his arm protectively around my shoulder. I belonged with him, and (though some of you may object), to him. We were a unit. I viewed the expanse of the water, the wildness of it, from the safety of my harbor. Do you see the symbolism, there? The symbolism of it struck me forcibly, and took my mind off into metaphysical realities, and resonances and meta-levels. The safety of Truth as one gazes out on the manifested cosmos. The safety of love as one beholds the undulating waves of created life and matter. So long as one stays in that safe harbor of love and truth, one can gaze on it and live, and not be destroyed or scattered. I felt supremely vulnerable, and supremely safe in Mathew's love. I knew his personal integrity. I knew it was a rock, like the rocks in the ocean, which were unmindful of the swells which broke on them. Then there were rhythms...all life in rhythms, in swells. But the rock stood them all. Just so my love for Matt, and his love for me. These were some of my thoughts...

No-one understood me, but Matt understood me. Do you know what it is like to be with the one who understands you? What bliss!

Our marriage was short, but our marriage has been for countless lifetimes; and also, now, when I am between lifetimes--still, we are married. Love can span even the rhythm of life and death. In the in-breath and the out-breath, our love remains constant, like a bridge. It is far more than the worldly might see, a guy who prefers to be married (or imagine he is married) to a spirit. This is no less than the conquering of death by love, the bridging of the gap--and it is a long-fought and hard-won accomplishment. May you accomplish it, also.

I am sorry, I got into an elevated state thinking of what my mind was like standing there overlooking the water; and I find myself staying that way, rather than being casual and "chatty" with you all, this evening. Steve obtained a position visiting and looking after elderly people. He starts his training Tuesday, then will shortly be offered assignments. Now, what karma may manifest through these connections? You can immediately see the potential. Steve is on the fast-track for karma in Portland. You have no idea the end of it all, where it all leads. Just know that I am an expert guide; and we are now operating at full efficiency, as a team. Steve offers no resistance to my guidance, and I can help him far more efficiently because of this. Just watch! ;-)

Steve is also attending the Spiritualist Church, and there is karma there, as well, and acceleration of learning, and connections. I am watching and supervising.

Steve visited Matt's grave recently; he plans on visiting mine, and that of our children (mine is a double grave, with our little daughter, Sarah), in the Spring, when he can place wildflowers on them. I wish, sometimes, I could give him my full body, in its young bloom, as I once did! But hush...we won't talk of such things. :-)

It was my joy to give myself fully to my husband, knowing I was making him supremely happy thereby--and the thought that it was me, myself, making him so happy made me happy, as well! This is what marriage is at its best, and we had it, even for that short time. Better to have the pinnacle of marriage for a few short years. The experience, once reached, is eternal. We touch the eternal place of perfect harmony again, and again, and again. We can touch it again as we are, today, with one on earth and one in heaven. It is the same eternal, sacred space, out of time, which we touch periodically, when we are at our best. Some day we will achieve it, eternally, and then we will know God.

And what else could I say after that?

Love to each and all,